So many people have the wish to transform, change, and reinvent themselves. Some of them wait until something unexpected happens or only postpone it to another month, or year. And time is passing by….But why do you not start now? Today?
Sometimes to get change to stick, you need to define and maintain your priorities. You need to find out your values, your purpose, something that is deep inside of you that demands that you do it. Something deep inside that CONNECTS you with change and makes you want to do it. That you feel pride and do it.
It would make you feel alive.
It would make you feel true to who you are.
It would make you feel congruent or a person of integrity to do those things.
If change is just something like, “Yeah, yeah, yeah I will do it someday.” It’s not going to be important. It’s not going to stick. At least, not at the levels in which you do it for a lifetime or you do it at a major level.
I would say another reason change doesn’t stick for a lot of people is because they don’t focus on that change daily. They came up with the idea; they wrote some goals about it. One day, they were all excited. They could remember the goals for a couple of days and then, the goals went away and they moved on to the next distraction, the next idea, the next thing and they lose that connection again with the goal, with the dream. And that’s the problem. It’s just a problem of attention.
In others words, for making this easier to understand. There are two primary reasons people fail to change:
#1. True Motivation and Connection for the desired change happens
They didn’t really want to change. They casually set a small goal but have no deeper sense of motivation or mission that would compel them to change. They need a clear goal that would make them feel real pride, joy and congruence if they achieved it. This is ultimately a problem of deep and sustained motivation.
#2. Attention problems/ Focus
They lack daily focus. They lose the connection with the dream because of distraction or competing interests. This is a problem of sustained attention. Ones you have it, there is nothing around you that take you out of your direction/decision.
And How do we solve such challenges? To solve these challenges, try these 5 big suggestions:
- Write down your goal (and why you want it) every single day.
- Don’t type it in your phone. Write it down with a pen or pencil every morning on a blank piece of paper. Write down what you want to change and why you want it to happen. Even if it’s the same as yesterday, write it down anyway. This will re-connect you with clarity and motivation every day.
- Put it in the calendar.
- Do it every single day until it’s a habit. Schedule the change. If it’s not in your calendar then you won’t do it. Until it’s done every day, it won’t become a conditioned habit.
- Measure progress every day.
- Journal every night or use a self-rating system that allows you to track your progress and areas where you can improve.
- Share your goal with everyone you know.
- Your social environment can give you the motivation and momentum you need to stick to things. If you don’t verbalize it and commit socially, you won’t stick to it.
- Get a coach or a comrade.
- Find a coach to help advise you and evaluate your progress. If you can’t afford a coach, then get a friend/comrade who can go through the process of change with you. They’ll keep you motivated and accountable.
Written by: Talita Moretti
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